How safe is the Rogue Valley's LGBTQ community?

As the hate group RV Saltshakers and other bigots step up their protests and attacks, some in the LGBTQ community are seeing an increase in harassment and intolerance

By Brad Smith

JACKSON COUNTY, Ore – Tyler should be a happy young man: He loves his home, loves his job and is deeply in love with someone.

He should feel safe – but doesn’t.

“There are times when I’m out in public, I feel like something bad could happen,” he said. “There are times when I feel so wary and uneasy, I can’t allow myself to relax or have fun.”

Tyler is gay. Openly gay. For him and others who belong to the LGBTQ community here in southern Oregon, it’s not a very easy thing to be. “I knew who I was early on. I just knew,” he said. “I accepted it and was fine with who I am. However, many in my family didn’t handle that very well. There was a lot of hostility and religious indoctrination. It was for me, emotionally, very brutal. I’m still coping with PTSD from that time of my life.”

According to studies published by the National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI), family rejection is strongly associated with mental health problems and suicidality, substance use, and sexual risk. Not surprisingly, parental rejection is linked to increased depression, suicidality and substance use among LGBTQ youth.

The research also states:

“It is important to note that those LGBTQ youth who do perceive strong support from their families tend to have better mental health and lower risk of substance abuse and – to a lesser extent -- sexual risk behaviors. The presence of parental support in the lives of LGBTQ youth indicates that parents and their children were resilient in the face of coming to terms with the teen's LGBTQ identity, which is often a significant stressor for both parents and teens.”

That wasn’t the case for Tyler.

“I’ve become the black sheep of the family,” he said with a laugh. “Some relationships with my family have been very strained and show no signs of changing. However, things have gotten better with other family members. It’s been a slow process but it’s progress nonetheless.”

Over the past year, he has found love.

“Meeting Eli is the best thing in my life. I love my job and I do have friends – but there was something else missing. That was Eli. Having them in my life made all the difference. However, there was a slight problem. Well, it was a problem for my family when they learned Eli is Black.”

It didn’t go well. Tyler said some of his family were “very outraged” upon learning Eli was Black. There was angry outbursts or tense, judgmental silence.

“I guess they felt that I’d gone out of my way to piss them off,” he said. “It’s upsetting because it seems that no matter what I do, or who I am, they’re not happy and they want to make me feel miserable.”

Eli’s family is unaware of the relationship.

“Based on what we experienced with my family,” Tyler said, “Eli and I are taking a more careful approach. It’s frustrating for us but it’s what we have to do.”

Eli, Tyler added, has been dealing with prejudice as well.

“It’s like this: We’ll be walking down the street and a white person gets out of their car. They look at Eli, stop, turn around and lock the doors. Sometimes, they don’t hide their fear and hate. You can clearly see it on their faces. It makes me sick.”

There have been times when Eli visited Tyler, as they drive through the neighborhood, someone stopped them and demanded why they’re in the neighborhood or who they’re seeing in the area.

“People have used their big pickup trucks to block Eli’s car and then comes the shouting, the threats,” Tyler said. “Or people will be on the sidewalks or in their yards, yelling and screaming at him. In my neighborhood, there are more than a few Trump signs or flags, Blue Lives Matter signs or Confederate flags.”

Tyler said that he and Eli have talked about moving elsewhere.

“We’re looking at Talent or Ashland,” he said. “Someplace where we’ll feel relaxed and safe. Safer, I should say. We don’t want to leave the area; this is our home and we do love it here. I don’t want to do that.”

Tyler and Eli aren’t the only ones who feel unsafe in southern Oregon.

A few years ago, the LGBTQ+ Community Survey was developed by the steering committee of the LGBTQ+ Listening Project – a group of queer and trans folks in Jackson and Josephine Counties in southwestern Oregon who came together with the leadership of Rory Meza in 2019.

The survey’s aim was to learn more about the needs of the LGBTQ+ community and the resources available in southern Oregon region. It was developed between February and June 2020, released in July 2020 and remained open until Oct. 31, 2020.

According to the survey information, more than 550 people responded. Reading the survey, it was troubling to learn that over 86 percent of those who answered felt “like they need to leave the area to live a good life.”

Here are some of the comments:

·         “Many people tell me I need to move to Portland or Eugene to feel more welcome.”

·         “Grants Pass is a very hard and dangerous place for non-straight, non-white people to exist and it's hard to get the money saved to move away due to unlivable wages, especially for non-white people.”

·         “My transfemme friend is about to move away, and another transwoman in the community also left for Baker City. She carries a gun because she never feels safe here. I think queer folks here are incredibly resilient and interesting and I would like our stories to be more known without putting anyone at risk.”

·         “This area is an absolutely beautiful place to live, but the “open mindedness” extends only as far as white supremacy and privilege has shown through experience. You can’t meditate away oppression. People here are completely unaware of the BLM movement and revolution needing to continue happening throughout our country and the world, and people here (as a generalization) are completely ignorant to queer history and culture.”

·         “Thanks for trying. I moved here from California because I couldn't afford to live there anymore and it's been a pretty depressing transition, having such a toxic atmosphere to try and survive in. I hope it gets better.”

·         “Recent protests have brought out alt-right white men with their guns. I don't feel safe at all anymore. Can't imagine what QPOC people feel right now.”

·         “I moved here for my ex’s job and got stuck here. I’ve been wanting to get out every day since. Having a community would make a big difference in feeling like this place was even somewhat politically acceptable.”

But there was more troubling data, several indications on how serious of a problem southern Oregon has with bigotry and harassment.

• 77 percent of people reported “feeling like you have to move out of the area to meet your needs or live a good life” at least once. 47 percent of people reported feeling this way frequently or somewhat frequently.
• 80 percent of people reported “feeling unwelcome at a public event or in a public space because of your sexuality, gender or appearance” at least once. 32 percent of people reported feeling this way frequently or somewhat frequently.
• 73 percent of people reported “harassment or bullying because of your sexuality, gender or appearance.” 25 percent of people reported feeling this way frequently or somewhat frequently.
• 83 percent of people reported “feeling you need to hide or change your sexuality, gender, or appearance to avoid harassment or discrimination” at least once. 42 percent of people reported feeling this way frequently or somewhat frequently.
• 32 percent of people reported “being targeted, harassed, or treated with unnecessary force by police because of your sexuality, gender or appearance” at least once. 9 percent of people reported having this experience frequently or somewhat frequently.
• 45 percent of people reported “being threatened with or experiencing physical violence because of your sexuality, gender or appearance.” 12 percent of people having this experience frequently or somewhat frequently.

Little over a month ago, Tyler said he “felt being under pressure and depressed.”

He voluntarily checked himself into a hospital for a 72-hour mental health evaluation. During that time, Tyler said he was able to “sort things out” and think about his life.

“I’m glad I did that, I needed to do that,” he said. “I felt on the edge and needed to get help. It was scary but Eli and a few other friends were there for me. They helped pull me back from the edge. I’m very fortunate. Some aren’t that fortunate.”

It’s a sad, sobering reality. According to the Trevor Project, suicide is a serious problem within the LGBTQ community, especially among younger people.

Here are the facts:

• Suicide is the second leading cause of death among young people aged 10 to 24 (Hedegaard, Curtin, & Warner, 2018) – and lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, and questioning (LGBTQ) youth are at significantly increased risk.
• LGBTQ youth are more than four times as likely to attempt suicide than their peers.
• The Trevor Project estimates that more than 1.8 million LGBTQ youth (13-24) seriously consider suicide each year in the U.S. – and at least one attempts suicide every 45 seconds.
• The Trevor Project’s 2021 National Survey on LGBTQ Youth Mental Health found that 42 percent of LGBTQ youth seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year, including more than half of transgender and nonbinary youth. 

It's a lot of information to absorb but that’s the seriousness of the problem. Tyler realized how dangerously close he was to having an emotional breakdown or even suicide. He had a loving partner and a network of close, personal friends who cared for him.

Some aren’t that lucky.

“Have things gotten better? Yeah, some progress has been made. Some,” Tyler said. “But it can always get better. And there’s a lot of uncertainty – especially here. We have a lot of hateful people here in the valley and I worry more will join them. As I said before. Eli and I don’t feel safe here.”

As of this writing, the two plan to move. Ashland or Talent are looking like safe places for them. They’ve even talked about Portland. However, Tyler said the last few times he and Eli were in Ashland, they were met with “unfriendly stares” from people on the streets or in restaurants.

“It was a very unpleasant vibe. Shocking, too. Maybe Ashland isn’t safe, not anymore. Are we safe anywhere? The thing is, I was born here,” Tyler said. “This is my home and the thought of me being forced out of my hometown really pisses me off. I want Eli and I to be safe and happy. That’s all I want for us.

“Is that too much to ask for?”

Those seeking help or question can contact the Rogue Action Center here.

For more information about the survey:

Rogue Action Center LGBTQ+ Community Survey

From The Archives: One Woman's Choice

 Note: This was originally written in November 2016. The Rogue River Press publisher, Teresa Pearson, opted not to run it because she felt the right to life side didn't have enough of "their side" presented. The Oregon Right to Life group didn't have anyone to interview -- they told me to find someone on Facebook. So, the story never ran. This article came about because one of Ms. Pearson's associates -- a devout Catholic -- was saying that "babies were being butchered" and that abortion was being used as a form of birth control. Ms. Pearson asked me to look into this; in doing so, I found the facts and, well, they didn't sit well with Ms. Pearson's views, in my opinion. The facts that abortions have declined over the years, that late-term abortions were rare and done due to extreme circumstances and how mothers are traumatized when faced with such decisions. Because of Ms. Pearson's narrow views, in my opinion, I was never able to tell Jillian Schoene's story or even present the facts.

Here's the article.

By Brad Smith

On Oct. 19, 2016, as she watched the third and final presidential debate between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, Jillian Schoene found herself angered by one remark made by the latter: “You can take the baby and rip the baby out of the womb in the ninth month, on the final day.”

The following day, both social media and news outlets were filled with reactions from doctors, nurses and other healthcare specialists, all of whom asserted that Trump was wrong. In The New York Times, Dr. Aaron B. Caughey, the chairman of obstetrics and gynecology at the Oregon Health and Science University, stated that such procedures do not occur in the United States. The doctor cited situations if the woman’s life was at risk – but even then, labor would be induced or a cesarean section performed. Moreover, he added, the term abortion would not be used. In those cases, it is called the induction of labor for a nonviable pregnancy.

Schoene found herself upset as she read the reactions.

“(Trump’s) lack of knowledge really got to me,” she said. “He didn’t know what he was talking about and he made it sound so cavalier. I know – because I had to make a terrible choice that no parent should have to make. You shouldn’t say something like that unless you have all the facts.”

Schoene and her husband had always wanted a family and they were “thrilled beyond belief” after learning she was having a baby.  Learning they were going to have a girl, Schoene and her husband picked out a name – Annabelle Rose. For several weeks, their lives were filled with medical checkups and preparations for Annabelle Rose’s arrival. In August 2012, Schoene had what she thought was a routine checkup with her doctor and at the time, she was 22 weeks pregnant.

The routine checkup took a “shocking turn” when her doctor gave her some news, Schoene said.

According to test results, the doctor said Annabelle Rose had a form of skeletal dysplasia, a genetic condition that would not allow her rib cage to grow. Schoene said it meant that from her daughter’s very first breath after being born, the ribs would prevent her lungs from expanding.

“In other words, she physically wouldn’t be able to breath,” she added. “Along with that, the doctor found other physical and mental developmental complications. It was very heartbreaking to hear. I can’t explain how surreal it is to have a conversation in which your doctor carefully and calmly explains to you that your baby girl will suffocate at birth.”

Schoene’s doctor urged her to seek out other opinions. So, she went to the Oregon Health and Science University and consulted with doctors there. Again, the results were the same and Schoene found herself facing an agonizing decision. “I had two choices: Carry Annabelle Rose to term and watch and listen as she tried to take a breath, but couldn’t – suffer as she gasped for air – or induce delivery at 23 weeks and allow her to quietly and less painfully pass away.”

It was very traumatic, Schoene said, but she knew the right choice had been made.

“My husband and I didn’t want Annabelle Rose to slip away like that. But, the reality was a horrible one,” she said. “What kind of mother would I be if I allowed my baby girl to suffer like that?”

In Oregon, such medical procedures are legal. According to Mary Nolan, executive director of Planned Parenthood Advocates of Oregon, they are rarely performed.

“We are talking about planned, wanted pregnancies,” she said. “That’s what happened with Jillian. She wanted that baby – but something went wrong. These so-called ‘late term abortions’ total up to one percent or so of procedures performed in the state. That’s one percent – a hundred or so procedures.”

According to the Guttmacher Institute, a research and policy organization focused on reproductive health issues and rights in the United States, of the more than 1 million abortions performed in the United States in 2011, about 12,000, or 1.3 percent happened after 21 weeks, more than halfway through a 40-week pregnancy. In that same year, in Oregon, 65,900 of the 758,988 women of reproductive age became pregnant. 68 percent of these pregnancies resulted in live births and 16 percent in induced abortions, while the rest miscarried. The Institute also reported that in 2011, 10,690 women obtained abortions in Oregon, producing a rate of 14.1 abortions per 1,000 women of reproductive age. Some of these women were from other states, and some Oregon residents had abortions in other states, so this rate may not reflect the abortion rate of state residents. The rate decreased 18 percent since 2008, when it was 17.2 abortions per 1,000 women ages 15 to 44. Abortions in Oregon represent 1.0 percent of all abortions in the country.

“Overall, unwanted births and abortions have been dropping for some time,” Nolan said. “It’s because we have better family planning, better access to contraceptives and more realistic approaches to sex education these days. That’s what we want to see.

“However, in cases like Jillian’s, women need to have that choice available to them. “

Liberty Pike, communications director of the anti-choice organization, Oregon Right to Life, felt that Trump’s statement was valid. “These horrible things happen. It’s very barbaric and it needs to be stopped.” However, Pike did not provide data on such alleged procedures.

Pike’s organization opposes abortions – even in cases of rape and incest – but does feel that the procedures are necessary only when the mother’s or infant’s life is at severe risk. The organization also opposes Oregon’s death with dignity law.

“I really do feel sorry for (Schoene),” she said. “No parent should be put in that situation. I’m glad that she consulted her doctor about it – but what if the doctor was wrong. What if both doctors consulted were wrong? Mistakes can happen. That could have been the case here. Even if the mother carried the infant to full term,” Pike said, “there could have been a chance of life. Again, doctors can make mistakes. We here at ORTL, as I stated before, feel abortions are only necessary when the mother’s or infant’s life is at risk. Was the infant really at risk?”

Schoene said she developed a “good, strong relationship” with her doctor and trusted the diagnosis.

“My doctor knew there was something wrong. We discussed my options and I was urged to seek out another opinion,” she said. “I had one of the best doctors at OHSU examine me and the diagnosis was the same. To even suggest that everyone I talked to was ‘wrong,’ well, that’s ludicrous. I would even say ‘deluded.’”

Schoene said she felt fortunate to be in Oregon, where she could have the medical procedure done.

“I know some people might think I’m terrible and I’ve even been called a murderer,” she said. “Contrary to what those people say, I loved my daughter. I wanted Annabelle Rose to be a beautiful, healthy girl and I wanted to watch her grow up. I wanted so many things.

“Then, that one day in August, it all changed.”

Time passed. Schoene and her husband moved forward with their lives. A few years later, during another routine checkup, Schoene learned she was pregnant.

“I was excited but apprehensive,” she said. “I thought about my daughter during that time. I didn’t want to go through this again. However, I now have a highly energetic boy named Cole and he gets excited about Halloween and Christmas. I’m so glad that we have him. He’s everything that we ever wanted.”

Since her experience, Schoene has worked hard to keep women’s access to healthcare and their right to choose intact. She has testified before legislative hearings and shared her experiences whenever possible. By doing that, Schoene hopes people will have a better understanding of why she has made her choices. – and why other women make similar choices.

"No one should ever have to make that decision," she said. "At least, here in Oregon, if someone has to, they have options available to them."